Somewhat Damaged.

And now I come back to the opening of my heart, somewhat battered from a lot of emotional drama that i've been keeping inside of me, and it will stay that way until i decide to open it up.  i love paradoxes. 

Somewhere there is some wretched soul living in a life of pure bliss, but I feel that they must be the most ignorant person that could have lived. unhinged somehow, living a life we all dream of. The most hated person to have lived, yet we give him all the worship in the world.

i think i'm judged for what i say, not what i think, or what i do. Except judged on that bad parts, the Somewhat Damaged parts of me. But Excuse the hedonism, i'm a self proclaimed hedonist, and i will probably spend my days as one, until i can't. at which point i will collapse inwards.

As my love of Aestheticism grows, i find it harder and harder to love. the deeper it goes, the further away grows my heart. Oh, my old loves, i wish they had never left. maybe i would still feel as i once did, but i feel i am part of a story that hasn't yet finished, where your the Queen and i'm the King. whoever the Queen is, let me know soonish... i want this horrible sagging to end, to feel like i'm more than material values once again. 

and there opens my heart.

Contradictory somewhat?

and a little different to what i usually post.

this is usually journal material.

Burger Party!

wow, that was a crazy night! to all of you who missed the burger party:-

you suck! 

haha! you missed out on some intense cooking, shi-ite loads of smoke, and yeah, all round fatty goodness!! i thank Anna and Sam for the help in the kitchen; without them, it would have been a hell of a lot harder to get it done!!

anyway, burgers aside, im feeling pretty anxious today; i have a paper due on tuesday that i'm no where near completing!! i'll try and get it done today, but it's gonna be hard....

and the sky is beautiful today, it's the middle of winter but all of the clouds have parted and i'm getting an amazing ray of light pouring through my window.. it is incredible! 

and i'm back home on saturday; anyone want to go for some drinksies?

take it easy sleazy's....

P.S Grants world is now on youtube if you don't already know! episode 2 up!

refrigerators???

So just to keep everyone filled in on Grants world - Sick Sad World, i put my first Vlog up yesterday. Half bamboozled on red wine from co-op. i think from a learning experience, i wont be doing that again...

anyway, just walking home today from university, and its amazing what people want to dump in the street. i mean, we've been fly tipped about three times since I got here (an arm chair, a buggy, and a second buggy) but leaving a refrigerator in the middle of the street? i mean thats just an assault course on the way of getting home. who does that?? apparently Sick Sad People in Portsmouth, my home away from home..

so whats happening in the news today? apparently Bill Clinton is getting out of the way of women, well, just Hillary... im trying to think of something witty to say about hillary, but if she reads it, she might try and false cry on me to get a sympathy vote... (and closure :-D) 

in idiot celebrity news, boy george has told a jury that a man trying him for false imprisonment in his home, handcuffing him and then beating him with a metal chain "can't really be relied upon". i swear thats the vaguest defense i've ever heard come out of celebrity sex scandal... 

in Grant news not much is happening with me at the moment, except a TONNE of work to do, and im having real trouble getting 2 of my essays off of the ground... ones a 2000 word, the other a 1000.. the 2k is due tuesday, and the 1k january.. no prizes for which one im more worried about.. 

but i've started drawing again, and the burger party is on saturday, which i can't wait for! although the constant cooking may be a strain.... 

thats todays report on the Sick Sad Shit, 

Take it easy Sleazy's..

Hey to you all, 

this is the first post on Grant's world, and its been a pretty hectic weekender.

first off,  I took all of my housemates into london, it was pretty tiring, but i love that City, so I'm gonna move there when I'm done (get your digs in now if you want to Live with El Granto in a few years!!).

yesterday was pretty cool too,  I had the guys from my Video Production group round (Yamatto, Beth and Charlotte), and we got the majority of our filming done too!! so we have, like, two bits left to do!

whats up the rest of this week? well for a start i have a 2k word essay due (>.>) next tuesday, so i'm gonna try and nail that tomorrow night..

and on saturday the house is running the Burger Party!!! so keep your digs in on that one XD BYOM!!!!!

and just for the record, I saw the sickest thing in the toilets the other day.  A man who knew no etiquette,  the man who wizze's  with everything at his ankles. 

and he was about 65 too..

Its Grants World. Grants Sick Sad World.